acceptance


a topic i think about a lot these days is acceptance. here are some words about acceptance, adapted from “for today”, a little book of daily meditations by OA.

pain often comes from non-acceptance. if i find that i can neither change nor accept a certain reality, i let it go for now, knowing that it is the first step in overcoming my misery.

if i allow it to pass through my life without trying to change it or escape from it, grief will leave me a more finished person. the problem is non-acceptance. my mind says, “no! no! i can’t bear it! change it! fix it! make it better!” round i go, giving myself no peace until, finally, i stand still and let myself feel the pain. accepting whatever comes – the sorrow as well as the joy – … is recovery.

the great enemy of the truth is very often not the lie – deliberate, contrived and dishonest – but the myth, persistent, persuasive and unrealistic. – john f. kennedy

“i love you; whether you love me is beside the point”

i accept whatever is put before me, knowing that acceptance is fundamental to spiritual growth.

how we humans hate discord! we have a talent for creating it, of course, but we don’t like it … i need to simply endure, go straight through a difficult discordant time without yielding to the urge to escape into my rut or to yell for somebody to fix it. … as i practice acceptance of life’s discords, life turns around and gives me harmony.

image by mshades

7 thoughts on “acceptance

  1. Evan

    There is much in this. Some of it I like a lot, some I’m wary of.

    Probably my biggest probably is it doesn’t say much about how to do it. But maybe that isn’t the purpose and so that may be an unfair criticism.

    I think changing the wold can be valuable to – I’m suspicious that this is a quietist/socially conservative philosophy (in my view we need vast and sweeping changes to how we live, actually we needed them to have happened decades ago).

    I also think that acceptance is the path to change in our personal lives. But accepting some things in the world beyond our skin is quite different.

    I think there are many things here – looking forward to seeing what other commenters say.
    .-= Evan´s last blog ..Boredom’s Cure, coming soon =-.

  2. nancy (aka moneycoach)

    A timely post for me, today, Isabella. As the weather turns up here (the snow having melted a scant 18 weeks ago) I again and chafing at many of the aspects of life here. Yet I know it’s good for me to be here right now, and that lusting over images of beautiful libraries, and symphony halls and cathedrals is wasted energy. *Grant me the serenity to accept …*
    .-= nancy (aka moneycoach)´s last blog ..9-5 and Worklife Balance – are they relevant or obsolete concepts? =-.

  3. Angelina

    Thank you Isabella for this post.

    I am assuming you are referring to emotional and psychological pain. Yes, by non-acceptance we perpetuate the pain because we likely have unreasonable expectations, which cannot be realized.

    However, in my opinion there is a distinction between accepting situations where you have no control and giving up. If you have the power to make your life easier by reducing your pain and suffering, then you must act. If it is out of your control then accepting your fate is the only reasonable action available to you. Even then, though changing your point of view you can bring about a positive change lessening your pain. For example the death of someone close, resulting in grief and pain. The pain comes from not accepting their death. Accepting death, as a natural process of life is healthy and it will transform your relationship with life.

    On the other hand, if you are miserable in your job, where you live, your friends and family, then you have a responsibility to act by making a positive change to your situation. Sometimes all it takes is a shift in how you think to break a pattern that can change the course of your life for the better. Everyone deserves to live a healthy, respectful and compassionate life and it is your fiduciary responsibility to yourself to ensure that you are an active participant in your life.
    .-= Angelina´s last blog ..Embarking on the Odyssey =-.

  4. isabella mori

    @evan “it doesn’t say much about how to do it” – no, a “how to” wasn’t the intention of this particular post.

    @angelina and @evan – it’s interesting how easy it is for us to think “acceptance vs. change” . when you look at the quotes, none of them imply that. we often think that acceptance equals passivity and fatalism – but it doesn’t need to, does it?

    for example, “i accept whatever is put before me” could mean “i accept it and then i decide what to do with it.” maybe acceptance sometimes comes before transformation?

    @nancy being irritated at the weather is definitely one of the types of examples i was thinking of. maybe in the next few days i should tell you all the story of the my ongoing fight with the photocopier that partly inspired this post 🙂

    @wellness writer and @mark, thanks for stopping by!

    I also think that acceptance is the path to change in our personal lives. But accepting some things in the world beyond our skin is quite different.
    .-= isabella mori (@moritherapy)´s last blog ..acceptance =-.

  5. Annie

    Isabella,
    Your post was helpful. Acceptance is a key issue for me and has been for a few years. I have been thinking in terms of letting go but perhaps acceptance will need to come before I can let it go. Thank you so much.
    Peace Annie

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