the other morning i felt really crummy. my back hurt, my bones felt stiff, and my head felt all fogged up. i couldn’t think straight and just wanted to crawl away but because i couldn’t think straight i couldn’t figure out where to.
now my back doesn’t really hurt anymore, when i move my head my neck doesn’t make weird creaking noises anymore, and all’s well with the world!
i’ve always been fascinated by the huge difference our physical state can have on our emotional state. (hey, maybe that’s one of the (many) reasons why i like working with people with chronic pain – don’t know if i’ve ever seen that connection.)
(warning – here comes the bathroom part:) you know how when you have to go to the bathroom really bad and at that moment, nothing else matters? i’ve always thought that’s really strange. at least, from a rational point of view it seems strange. in most situations it’s not as if a bathroom isn’t relatively close and i know it’s going to take, say, 10 minutes at the most to get there. and experience tells me i’m not going to pee (or worse) my pants.
so what’s the problem? why does the world all of a sudden shrink to the thought, “i can’t wait to get to the bathroom i can’t wait to get to the bathroom”? why do i feel i’d happily sell my soul for a bathroom right here, right now? i mean, this is not exactly life threatening!
by the way, i’m not alone in this. there is a scene in ken follett’s jackdaws where an older lady is tortured simply by plying her with ample amounts of food, coffee and beer and then not letting her go to the bathroom. she ends up betraying her friends from the french resistance.
i could finish all this with something about “matter over mind” being stronger than “mind over matter” – sometimes, at least. but i suspect that’s the wrong way of looking at it. in the end, it’s probably more useful to experience body (matter) and mind as one entity, not as one “having” the other, dominating the other.
lots of stuff to think about here …
(i hope you don’t find this gross. my german background, combined with my husband’s japanese influence, leaves me somewhat insensitive to the north american aversion to discussing such matters. there isn’t even the equivalence of “bathroom humour” in the german language.
also, this post is a repost from my old change therapy blog. somehow the january 2006 posts never made it over to my wordpress blog. this blogathon seems to be a perfect time to repost those that i haven’t manually copied over yet.)
this is an entry for my participation in the 2008 blogathon, a 24-hour marathon of blogging. please support the cause and donate – however much, however little – to the canadian mental health association (vancouver/burnaby branch). to donate, email me or use this URL: www.canadahelps.org/CharityProfilePage.aspx?CharityID=d2252. you should be able to get there by clicking the link; if not, just copy and paste the link into your browser. it will take you to the appropriate location at canada helps.
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