Tag Archives: tony robbins

free-form writing frenzy #4: motivate or mayonnaise?

free-form writing prompt #4: are you motivated?

are you motivated? are you motivated? are you motivated? are you motivated yet???? sounds like some frenzied sports coach. yuk. i don’t WANNA be motivated. so there. hows DEM apples, as t would say.

it sounds like someone with a whip. i don’t really like whips. slave driver. i don’t like slave drivers.

what i DO like: soft, friendly people who look at me with their heads to the side and ask cool questions. like, “what delights you?” “what do you WANT?” as in what do you fancy right now. a pony? a peonie? a penny? a p p p p … hm what else could be wanted that starts with a p? a penis? a putterfly? penny pincher?

those are things and words that i like. what do YOU like? what do YOU fancy? what are words that make YOU go, yes! yum! hmmm? yum?

yum is a good word. can you tell i like food? but who doesn’t. yum is so much better than “motivate”. mayonnaise is better than motivate.

what mayonnaises you?

and then there is a picture of munch’s “cry” beside the quote that elizabeth chose for the quote. that doesn’t help. maybe that’s why i went “yuk” instead of “yum” when i read “motivate”.

it also makes me think of tony robbins and his big teeth. the king of motivation. the emperor of “just do it”. he means well, he really does, i believe him, somehow, even though he probably lies through his white teeth once in a while. but he does it kinda cute-like. i can’t get mad at him. and i get his desire to get people motivated. so that’s ok, tony. i’m just not ready to go and drop $1,309 in your lap so that you can MOTIVATE me.

i’ll stick with mayonnaise for now. white gooey half-fat mayonnaise. with tuna. or in the mustard sauce. yup. that motivates me.