recovering from anorexia: 10 activities

what do people do when they start on their recovery from anorexia? here is a list of ten things that those who deal with this eating disorder mention most frequently. these are activities that they themselves decide on. that’s important to keep in mind. if i were to say to one of my clients, “jo, why don’t you cook a nice meal for anne and bob? you could prepare something you like and then have some yourself!”, it would quite possibly backfire. however, i’m happy when a client comes in and tells the story of doing some of these things.

(if you’d like a bit of support with any of this, drop me a line).

1. positive eating, e.g.
meeting up with a friend for lunch, even though it’s scary to eat in public
eating a healthy breakfast (not just a 1/2 cup of dry cereal)
cooking for friends – and participating in the meal afterwards

2. engaging in healthy relationships, e.g.
choosing to go to a movie with a friend rather than staying home surfing the internet
setting boundaries with a sibling
discussing the relationship with a partner or girl/boyfriend

3. walking away from unhealthy eating behaviours, e.g.
no purging
no declining to eat in public
talking to a friend about something that makes you angry rather than starving over it

4. gentle exercise and resting, e.g.
taking a half-hour walk rather than going for a one-hour run
skipping gym for a day
resting when tired, rather than drinking black coffee

5. positive self-talk, e.g.
“i am someone, and beautiful to boost!”
“the world is not a fearful place”
“it’s no big deal. each day is just a chance to try out new things.”

6. honesty, e.g.
not saying “fine!” with a fake smile every time someone asks “how are you”
being totally honest about food with at least one person
not bottling up feelings of fear and ambivalence when having sex

7. doing nice things for yourself, e.g.
getting a long overdue haircut
going shopping for “normal” clothes (not clothes that will hide the body)
just spending a nice day – maybe reading, going to a movie, sleeping in

8. spending quiet time with your feelings, e.g.
journaling
crying
creative visualization

9. professional help, e.g.
seeing a psychotherapist
attending group
making that long overdue appointment with the nutritionist

10. positive body image, e.g.
going to the beach in a bathing suit
spending time in front of the mirror
having sex in broad daylight

isabella mori
counselling in vancouver

235 thoughts on “recovering from anorexia: 10 activities

  1. Aliyah and Jordy, Thanku so much for your lovely positive comments ๐Ÿ™‚ It is so nice to get it off my chest (so to speak) to people who understand the hell that is Anorexia. I have been reading lots and have a better understanding of how/why its developed and I kinda feel a bit ‘normal’ knowing I’m not the only one with this awful illness. I have felt so alone for years, but now I’m going to turn my life around with a little help from friends and family. Thankyou again. Much love and peace to you both xox

  2. You’re very welcome…I hope you write again if you ever need more support. It can feel very lonely and isolated having anorexia, but you’re far from alone. Sometimes I even have a hard time convincing myself that it’s a real disease and that I’m not just inflicting it on myself. I try to remind myself that it is hellish and sad and lonely, and that no one would ever choose that. I’m glad you’re getting help from friends and family. I’ve tried to steer clear of anyone who invalidates anorexia as an illness, and it has helped a lot. Just a bit of advice… Hope it helps ๐Ÿ™‚
    And again, good luck

  3. I’m 15 yrs old, 5”5 and currently weigh 96 lbs., I’m recovering from anorexia but I’m still not sure I want to recover. I’ve been hospitalized twice already this year and had an eating disorder in 8th grade too. I feel like I don’t need to gain anymore weight even though everyone else thinks I really need too. I feel sooooo huge, and disgusting. My lowest weight was 89 lbs. and that compared to now makes me feel like I’m a faliure. I’m afraid of relapsing again, but I’m evern more afraid of getting fat. What should I do?

  4. Hey El,
    I can completely relate to you. My lowest weight in the eighth grade was around yours, and I started panicking when I gained weight. It’s okay. Statistically speaking, there’s no possible way for you to be overweight. You’re not even close. For me, it took a long time to realize that I’m happiest when I’m healthy. It took a long time for me to want to get better, and to take the chance to see what happened by increasing my food intake. Someone told me to just try, and if I didn’t feel better, if I wasn’t comfortable, I could stop eating and go back to the way things were. Honestly, I wasn’t productive, and my life was going nowhere very fast. I didn’t like being miserable and tired and cold all the time. When I realized I didn’t like living that way, which was only about a month ago, I started eating. It still scares me, but I’m happy. Yesterday, I was smiling and giggly for no good reason, and I loved it. Whenever I start to freak out about eating now, I try to remember instances in which I was happy and healthy, and how depressed I was when I was unhealthy. It’s a little piece of what works for me…I hope it helps you, too, even just a little bit. Stay strong, and I wish you the best of luck. I hope you find happiness and health.

  5. Thank you very much for replying back to me, Jordy, It makes me feel good to know that someone out there understands how I feel. Sometimes it feels like its me against the world and I’m always fighting back. I honestly don’t think I need to gain more weight, I’m absolutely terrfied that THEY (my doctors and therapists) want me to get up to 115 lbs. That’s absoutely crazy and I know I can’t do it. I won’t. I’m trying to get better but I think its mostly because everyone else is forcing me to. It’s not like I can go back to starving myself with so many people watching me all the time. I just feel so hopeless somtimes. It’s great that I’m not so tired or cold all the time but it’s also scary to actually have my appetite back. I feel guilty if my stomach growls, I feel so angry at myself. I just cant seem to see that way othes see me. What can I do?
    .-= El´s last blog ..a song for anorexia =-.

  6. Aliza- You deserve to get better!!!!!!!!!! you have worked so hard, so hard gighting this stupid disorder! Anorexia is talking when you think the weather is a sign, its NOT a sign. Weather is unpredictable and uncontrollable. The disorder doesn’t want to let you go, so its LYING to you. Tellling you that you don’t deserve to see a counselor and get better. It wants to stay in your head forever!!!!!!!!! Forever is a LOOOOONG time. Do you want to have anorexia forever, never get better, never knbow what happiness is???? The sound of silence in your head??? Being yourself and discovering the REAL you are the best feelings ever. Ana wants you to suffer, so it will lie to you to keep you miserable. It is your job to recognize the lying voice and tell it to SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!! You want to really smile, laugh with all your heart, be with friends and not thinking of food and calories, to just be NORMAL. Thats possible, I found it after 5 years. 5 years of misery and pain and wanting to die. There were times where I held the razor in my hand juyst tracing the vain up and down my wrist wondering if life is really wortrh the PAIN of recovery. Well you know what, IT IS., There’s so much more to life, so much more. Keep pushing through these rough patches hun, life can only get more enjoyable. YOU CAN DO IT!

    El- Do ont, and I mean DO NOT focus on numbers! The numbers are scary, very high and very scary. Focus on happiness. On feeling a weight lift off your shoulders and gaining the love of life back! Do you want to only feel sadness and pain and misery? Nobody does, we all are wonderful girls who are loving, generous, intelligent, talented, and so much more. You deserve to live a life free of an eating disorder. Before the doctors say numbers ask them upfronbt not too, say you feel unprepared at this time to gear numbers but want to get better and be happy. They will listen, mine did. It’s all about YOU, recovery is all about YOU and what YOU want. If your stomach growls, try a small snack or meal. How about yogurt or cream cheese or a handful of trail mix? I say thhose because they have protein, which makes you feel less hungry for a longer period of time than water based foods, are very good for you, and do not make you feel too full or bloated just content or ok. Seriously, its soooooooo hard to eat sometimes. Emotions have tight controls over us, and so does stress. But you have to remind yourself you are HUMAN and humans need nutrients and energy in their body to live. You deserve to live, so keep on fighting for your friends, family, and most importantly yourself!

  7. awake at 3am worrying about the yogurt i just ate.
    I have gained 3lbs everyones really happy.
    I like it when people are happy and not worried.

    I hate anorexia, I’ve had it for 10 years and only just realised in these last few months how bad it is.
    facing this demon is harder than I thought. No wonder my boyfriend had enough.

    I don’t know why I’m posting this – I’m finding it hard 2day ๐Ÿ™

  8. Ive suffered from Anorexia for the past 12 months and have just in the last 2 weeks given up the denial and acknowledged that i have a problem that I am unable to fix myself. For 12 months i have been supplied will all kinds of support, doctors, psychiatrists, psychologists, naturopaths (you name it) but the entire time i wasnt really using the support or wanting it. 2 weeks ago it felt like a switch flicked and i could see just for a brief moment what everyone else was seeing. i looked in the mirror and saw a very sick girl, it felt like i had been blind folded the entire time. Ever since my realization ive been extremely stressed, and experiencing severe anxiety/panick attacks where i get so worked up my body is covered with sweat, my heart races, my hands shake and i start hallucinating that the world is spinning and pushing down on my chest. ive started seeing a professor and a nutritionist at an eating disorder clinic in Bondi (Australia) and so far they have been amazing. I didnt know how difficult the recovery process would be and im feeling like im not strong enough to beat it. like alot of others in this thread ive started ‘pretend bingeing’ late at night when everyone is in bed. I get together a whole range of really unhealthy foods, cake, chocolate, cereal etc and i pretend to binge – meaning i fill my mouth with the foods and chew but spit it out before i swallow. this usually lasts all night, ill pack all of the chewed foods up at about 4am, purge the soft drink i have drunk because i feel that even though i didnt swallow the food some may have gotten down to my stomach. This is a new process for me, its costing a lot, sometimes i even steal my parents card to buy the food and i hide bags and bags of chewed food in my room until i can throw them out without my parents noticing. I cant eat during the day, i dont ever feel hungry and ideas of eating during the day leave me borderline suicidal. I would really love any tips anyone has for getting out of this late night binge/purge routine if they have gone through something similar because right now the chance to binge at night seems to be all i look forward to. i stop myself from eating during the day because i want to save myself for my night time binge.

    Another thing im worried about is that ever since i acknowledged my problem and got the motivation to get the help i feel as though the anorexic inside of me is fighting back. almost like the more i try to pull away the more it digs its heels in. i can see that im making more rules around eating, stricter rules, more severe consequences for slip ups and even some of my old rules and habits are starting to creep back into my mind. things like laxative use, nurofen plus (i took about 16 capsules everyday for almost 8 months because they would suppress my appetite and blur my mind up so that i was able to go out in public and face people. also so i could enjoy a couple of hours of stillness in my head – im sure everyone here knows that being anorexic means having your brain scream at you ever second of every day, even in your dreams)

    Im not really sure what questions to ask i just know that im feeling really lost at the moment. this battle is much harder than i had anticipated and i truly feel that i cant do it. i dont feel strong enough. it feels like all ive had for the last 12 months is this eating disorder, its consumed me and if someone takes it away im afraid ill have nothing.

    If anyone has any stories of their own that they can offer or if anyone has experienced something similar id love your input. i need to know that im not the only one, that im not just some crazy person and that like other before me, i will win this never ending battle.

    Thankyou so much for this thread of comments, it really does offer so much to people who really need and deserve this kind of support.

    xoxo

  9. Hey Jessy,

    It’s been a long while since I checked back on this page, but I just want to give you a big hug and let you know that you are not alone!!!

    Lots of girls (and guys although we don’t see too many pop on by here) have gone through what you have. We have been at the same pages where you have been. We’re all like a big family here, and you are VERY welcome to go check the pages on the top, Anorexia Talk (whether it be one, two, or three) group to go communicate with lots of other girls there who have been through what you have been through.

    I have work soon so I cannot write a long response, but I hope you do check the other pages out! The people there are really amazing, :D.

  10. Congrats to all who are considering or in the midst of recovery–you have my sincere respect and best wishes, because this is one of the hardest things any of us will overcome.
    I am in recovery from a relapse, and one thing that I have done is limit my time with people who trigger my eating disorder behaviors. I had a friend who did not understand the serious of the disease, and saw behavior such as forcing yourself to throw up after drinking alcohol as normal. I continually found that after spending time with him, I was returning to my ED behaviors. So I decided to spend less time with him. Every time I sit down to eat, I picture my healthiest friends and family members in my mind, and think about how I want to follow their example. If I slip up, I always try to imagine how they would feel if they knew what I was doing to myself. It doesn’t always work completely, but it does help keep me on track.

  11. Hi my name is Chris and I am 21 years old and I have battled anorexia since I was 11 years old. One of the biggest problems was that I developed at the age of 9, so I was bigger and gaining weight in different places then all my friends. I’m only 5 foot 2, been that height for what feels like forever, anyways I will try to make this short. when I was little my mom used to say stuff like “I can hear you chew from across the table”. So that made me self continuous about eating in public, being “larger” then my friends in high school at a weight of 150 lbs and I used to work out every single night, skip breakfast and lunch, I would eat dinner because I didn’t want my family to know. I discovered that the only way for me to lose weight was to just not eat and it worked I felt great! Fortunately I had great friends that noticed my significant weight loss and confronted me about my problem (My family didn’t really notice…till now how thin I was) My problem right now is that my BF knows about my problem and is amazingly supportive and I have gained so much weight over the past four years and I’m so scared about re-lapsing and yet at the same time I welcome it because all I hear from my mom is how big I am and why don’t you just do what you did in High school when you were so thin and I want to tell her what it is but I’m so scared of her reaction. I’m 180 lbs now I work out, I eat right but I can not get rid of the weight. I really just need someone who understands what I’m going through!

  12. I was anorectic for 25 years but have now been normal weight for 10 years. (I am 50 years old now and it has been a long struggle). What I wast to say was it took quite some time a good few years in fact for the food obsession to pass even though I was normal weight but very slowly it does improve and it gets easier as time goes on so don’t give up because my life now is so much better.

  13. chris- hi , im aliyah. congrats on recovery and getting to a healthy weight . Im sure along the way you have realised that food isnt needed to alleviate stress and feelings and negativity because controlling food doesnt solve anything. anytime u are in stressfilled situations , feeling like you might trigger count to ten and try to alleviate it in other ways- writing, phoninh ur bf of whatever.
    restricting food is only going to make u feel worse, and im at a healthy weight and im happy, but i know how u feel and it can be scary.
    just stay strong, and all will be well, you have come really well. dont give into the voice!

  14. heeey,
    im 16 years old and have recently over the past year lost 17 kilos. I walk 3 times a week for an hour and eat extremely healthy, i was always the bigger built girl before this ive gone from 67kg to now 50kg, i am proud that ive been able to do it but now i am obsessed with food and its taking over my social life, i wish i never lost weight in the first place sometimes just so i could be happy and eat whatever i wannt whenever i want.I am becoming anorexic obsessed with food always freaking out after i eat, like i binge out on so many sultanas is that bad ? i want to put a little bit of weight on but im scared of weight gain and that if i start eating more the weight gain wont stop ? can i eat normal foods like i used to or will i gain all my weight back? what do i do ?

  15. Hi ebony
    First of all WELCOME! I am so glad you found this site before your health really suffers. Anorexia usually does start off as a diet, a person loses weight and feels great so they keep onloosing weight hoping to feel even better. But then the obsession starts, food and weight and calories and exercise dominate your thoughts, is that where you are now?
    It sounds like a nutrition plan would be really helpful for you. You would know how much calories you need and what foods are the best choice to meet your specific needs. If you treat yourself with the foods you enjoy, but portion control them or only have them once a week, you will not gain weight.
    From your post you sound very healthy, and not too far into anorexia yet. Talk to a doctor, so you can find out your body’s healthy or ideal weight range. That might help you feel more at ease. Remember you are not overweight and did the right thing by coming to this site and seeking hlep now before the anorexic thoughts consume your life.
    Good luck and remember everyone on this site will be here whenever you need to vent or advice.
    PS sorry for any typos it is 1:20 am in California

  16. ebony- hi im aliyah, i know exactly how you feel, i have the exaxt same thoughts as you when i was at that stage. I had anorexia and bulimia for years and recovery is honestly the best path, your regaining back your life and not putting urself at risk!
    you need to take it one step at a time, i dont know how much ur eating, but start to eat a bit more every 4 hours at least, by not eating u slow down urmetabolism. And there is going to be a lot of resistance, and negative feelinsg but u need to push past it, and not let it control u . Also your only REgaining back weight u lost, and you wont get fat because ur body has a set point which it works best at, and you need to let ur body get there.
    Also the less u eat, the more obsessive u become, because a starved mind obsesses, its a biological fact, so belive it or not the more u eat the better and in time the negative thoughts will start to go away.
    Challenge ur thoughts, and if u have someone u can tell and talk to i would.
    wud u go to a doctor?

    make a little meal plan, of breakfast, lunch and dinner and two snacks and tick it off each day , r egular eating is really important.
    good luck x

  17. these comments really help guys ๐Ÿ™‚
    the thoughts of food are really ruining me though im not hungry but the thoughts just amke me want to eat, its just been easter and ive eaten so badly like pigged out on chocolate and usually i just eat healthy food, is this going to make me put on weight ? because for the last week ive pigged out on so much chocolate and big meals ? i want to gain a little bit of weight but what do i do once ive reached the weight i want to be ? and how much junk food can you eat with getting fat ?
    im just scared im going to gain every bit of weight i lost in the first place ๐Ÿ™

  18. hi everyone
    im only 14 and im not anorexic and have never had an eating disorder but lately ive been obsessing about my body a lot and i really dont want to become anorexic. I know im perfectly healthy and fit and im in the healthy weight range for my height and age, but i really dont want to develop an eating disorder because i know it will ruin my life. Im not fat, and im not even chubby, and i feel like im pretty and have great friends and family, and im doing good in school. I dont want to lose any weight and i dont want to get any thinner, and i dont want to get sick. I just feel like i need a place to anonomously write down how i feel, so that i wont develop an eating disorder.
    Cheryl

  19. Hey all!
    I’ve been reading these comments and doing research for a while now and decided to finally ask for advice. I’m 17, have always been chubby (70-75kgs) and my weight has always cause stress for me. Though i am quite tall (174cm – about 5′ 8.5″) i have always felt pressure to lose weight. I have been suffering from depression for about 5 years (this is due to seperate issues, not stress about weight) and recently started getting help for that. My depression worsened quite significantly about half a year ago and i lost a few kilo’s and i decided to lose more weight. I lost about 1o kilo’s in two month’s through a horrible diet and nightly purges. Losing the weight felt great and i felt really in control but i decided to stop because i didn’t particularly want anyone to notice and i didn’t want to fall into an unhealthy BMI range (my current BMI is about 20). This has been almost impossible. No matter how many times i tell myself that I DO NOT WANT TO LOSE MORE WEIGHT, every bite i eat seems to be a struggle. I can’t eat anything without counting the calories and hating myself for eating them. This hasn’t been great for my depression because it lowers my self-esteem significantly…
    My query is this, do i have a problem? I am well within the healthy weight range but do not have my period, am still losing weight and am now losing a significant amount of hair. I have cut down on the purging and because my parents don’t know that i am restricting my diet (i come from a typically european family where food is a MUST) i have definately been eating more than i was.
    Ebony – I can relate to your story in the way that i feel like if i start eating i’ll gain all the weight back. And the pigging out on chocolate? I did that recently… Felt pretty bad after that.
    Cheryl – I don’t have a lot of experience with eating disorders (I don’t even know if i have one) but if you’re scared of developing one then i would definately say that you’re probably thinking about food and weight in the wrong way. All i can advise you to do is to remember that you are in the healthy range and that whatever society may tell you, you’re perfectly healthy. I can also assure you that bad food habits are hard to get out of so just don’t get into the habit, enjoy food.
    Good luck to everyone struggling!
    Sofie

  20. heeey, sofie we relate totally the same, i know exactly what your going through im slowly getting better, i just need someone to talk too.
    i also cant stop bingeing, which is making me depressed, i just wanna go back to not having a care about food at all.
    if you have an email we could help eachother or talk about it if you would like.

  21. Hi All, Stumbled across this site the other day while looking at other Helpful E.D sites.
    My name is Belinda and i’m 26 from Australia.
    I First was Diagnosed with Anorexia when i was 17, i somehow got my self sorted by my self but thn 2 years later started to relaps. before i got really dragged back into the terror of annorexia i fell preganat with my daughter, it saved my life… my annorexia seemed to just dissapear!! i never really gave it a thought, i was the healthiest i had been in a long time, i then fell pregnant again but this time the annorexia started to creep back in… by the time my son had turned one it was starting to control my life again.. by the time he was 2 i had been in hospital twice and had to be admitted into an in-patient facility for 5 months!!
    i have been home now for almost 6 months now and although i have a more positive outlook on recovery it’s like there is a wall i just can not get over. I decide i will try and gain a bit more weight, i gain a bit freak out and then loose it again. I do eat ok now, but my problem is, is that my motabolizim goes crazy when i start eating regular healthy meals. When i had to stay in the clinic they thought i was doing things to not gain weight… but i wasn’t. In order for me to gain weight i have to eat an obcene amount of food!! My husband was in total shock over the amount of food was on my meal plan to get me to gain such a tiny tiny amount. I eventually gained some weight and am alot happier, i need to gain more but i just can’t seem to do it. I look at my beautiful kids and get angry at myself and think ” what does it matter if i am thin or fat?? my kids are important … not how many kj’s or cal are in an apple or a piece of bread” I dont want to set a bad example for my daughter. I have had lots of therapy but nothing seems to trigger what is still holding me back. Why cant i move past my “magic number” ?
    I understand those of you having trouble with the Binge issues. I have been throught this and also started bulemic practises because of my junk food binges… My advice for this ( from my dietician) If you are eating enough “healthy food” from all food groups you will not binge eat. I have found this true for my self. It took a long time for me to let my self believe this and follow a plan and make sure i had a sandwhich etc for lunch… ( i had an intense fear of bread) a diet that consists of 3 meals and 3 snacks is alot better than a binge on chocolate biscuits ice cream etc etc. I had got to a point that i would not allow anything in my pantry that i thought i would binge on, with 2 kids that is rather horrible… it ment my cuboards were rather bare! ( hard to make school lunches) I now have cuboards full of food… i eat my 3 meals and 3 snacks,.. it is still a struggle… i go through waves of looking forward to my next meal because i’m starting to enjoy food, to fear and anxiety of my next meal because i dont want it to make me fat… and fear of skipping meals and being back in hospital away from my family.
    I understand the “set point theory” But it scares me, i’m scared to find out what my set point is.
    I’d love to stay where i am at, but my doctors tell me i wont get rid of my annorexic thoughts untill i am within the healthy weight range.
    It’s just so unbelievably hard!
    Sorry i have typed so much and it’s all over the place… i could type and type for days about my story… just typing all thay i keep thinking.
    Wishing you all the best in your battles and your road to recovery
    Thanx for all your posts they have been helpful and make me feel not so alone in my illness

  22. hi, im helping my friend overcome her anorexia nervosa.
    Hers is a mild case, slightly underweight but is a super calory counter.
    Any suggestion where I should start?
    Please advice.

    Regards
    .-= Caloric´s last blog ..1st Post: 100510 =-.

  23. hey caloric i suggest that you try to encourage her to eat reguarly, so suggest things like why dont we go out for dinner today or try this new chcolate bar thats out.
    Aat the heart of anorexia lies a phobia of gaining weight, and an obsession with food, so i suggest nice compliments to boost her confidence, and hionestly just be there for any form of advice and support.
    ur a lovely friend for doing this for her x

  24. hi everyone, i just wanted to say something to Sofie. im recovering from anorexia and i recognise pretty much everything you say about your thoughts on food and weight as what I was thinking at the beginning. I know you’re not a dangerously low weight at the moment but I really think you should try and get help as soon as possible because from what you say it sounds like you’re on a downward spiral and it gets out of control so quickly. You won’t put on weight until you eat 2500 calories EVERY day (trust me its a LOT harder than you think), in fact you’ll just keep on losing weight. and I know that you probably won’t trust me when I say that because i didnt trust the professionals saying it to me but unfortunately its true and you will just keep on losing weight otherwise. and the more weight you lose the more your brain will make you obsess over it…sorry this sounds like a story of doom I just wanted to make the point. if you’re seeing someone about your depression maybe you can talk to them? but don’t be put off if they don’t understand, there are specialists for a reason. anyway, i hope I havent scared you i just think you should try and do something about it now x x x

  25. heeey girlies, ive been trying to recover myself cause we just dont have the money for therapy or anything like that, im not horribly skinny i could do with an extra 4 kilos or so and i eat 3 meals and snacks a day i also exercise and play soccer, but im on the verge of anorexia nervosa i obsess over food and have a fear of gaining weight, can anyone help me out with a right food and exercise plan and what amounts are right to eat ? i just wanna be happy again like at school i used to be call GB for ghettobooty cause everybody loved my butt hahaha i miss my butt and boobs i wasnt fat i was just built i guess but i let the exercise and less amounts of food get to me and i lost 17kgs but i weigh 49kg now but im not dagerously skinny but i fear if i eat i will put all my weight back on ? i hate being like this i love kim kardashians and beyonces body i think they are gorgeous and are perfect body image girls what real women should look like im just scared ill put all my weight back on because everyody seems to say no one ever keeps the weight off they pile it back on and even more and the obsession of food and gaining weight is driving me insane can anyone help me ? i aslo binge out like a lunatic on sultanas im obsessed once i start i cant stop is this bad to eat all the time ?

  26. hi ebony, the problem with eating disorders is that they are so complex and obsessions lie at the heart of it.
    Its good urnot too underweight and that you admire bodies such as beyonce. obsession gets worse as u lose weight, thats why anorexia is such a destructive diseases, the more u lose the more u obsess and the more u keep losing.
    The best thing is to REgain whatever u lost, u wont keep gaining and gaining, thats the most common worry and its false because ur body has a set point it works best at, and when u get to it, and listen to ur hunger cues ull just maintain ur weight.
    for bingeing, try to put a few with you, so say u binge and have 12 usually, put 4 with you, and just eat them and then tel yourself thats it, if i feel like another i can have it later.
    the sultanans are always going to be there. but i can relate it is hard, and it reqires will power. I used to have to eat a whole bunch of grapes, i cud never eat a handful or whatever, and now i can. its possible x

  27. when you say a set body weight does that mean you eat whatever you want whenever you want or ? thank you for the advice its helps ๐Ÿ™‚ i just wanna go back to normal i miss going out with myfriends and eating what they eat its just so hard

  28. a set point is a healthy weight for ur body, where u eat a similar amount of food every day. It doesnt mean u can eat whatever u want , whenever and never gain weight, it just means thats a body where u dont feel severe obsessions, and a weight that stays similar by eating similar amounts of food. It means somedays u mite eat lesss, some days more but if u listen to ur hunger signals u will be fine ๐Ÿ™‚
    Nothing will happen by adding carbs except good things! U will have more energy, and more varied diet and good nutrition. never cut out carbs, no wonder u have obsessions ebony. Cutting out food is really serious, but u can get back to a stage where u can go out and enjoy food with friends x

  29. Hey!
    Pinker, thanks for your message. Though i was unwilling to admit it when you first posted, I now think that i am a little on a downward spiral. I did mention it to my psychologist who was seriously worried but didn’t quite understand…
    I tried eating a little more for a while and ended up binging and probably eating about 1700 – 2000 calories a day but freaked out when i felt that i was gaining weight so restricted quite badly for about 3 weeks. I lost weight quite rapidly but kind of freaked out after the weekend because i felt seriously dizzy and sick after going running. Iรขโ‚ฌโ„ขm eating again (a little) at the moment but have a few questions.
    Is it true that you can become infertile through restriction?
    How do i deal with my parents? (they found me purging the other day) So far they have been trying to force me to eat but my stomach cramps up and i can’t actually physically eat what they’re trying to make me eat.
    I’m absolutely terrified of not being in control of how much weight i could gain if i start eating again because my parents refuse to have any weighing scales in the house…
    Hope everyone is doing well!
    x

  30. Hi,
    i am a very independent driven 22yr old. i have recovered from anorexia-partially-over the last two years so family and friends would stop worrying about me. i now weigh 60kg at 170cm(is this pretty standard?)
    i know i need to eat a certain amount each day, which i manage to do, but i cant comfortably eat during the day in front of anyone. i calorie count everything. i never stop thinking about food-sometimes i cook so i dont feel like im obsessing over food, im merely thinking about the task at hend…
    i hate eating big meals and tend to have bites of food i.e never just one big thing. i feel as if i am tricking myself by having ‘half a biscuit’ even though i end up having another half…in my head i didnt have ‘a whole biscuit’. does this make sense to anyone? should i see someone? and how do i find someone to see if i should? thankyou, and thanks for posting so much on this blog-it is really helpful

    ps: does anyone else look in the mirror every single chance they get, i am always touching the fat on my legs and arms etc

  31. Hi Stubborn,
    Right now I understand that what I tell you seems impossible. I know that because I have been exactly where you are now. Day by day, bit by bit, inch by inch, it gets easier. I did not believe it possible when I was where you are and I’m not saying it will ever go away completely. However, by doing what you are doing right now you are so on the right road and you must not be so hard on yourself. The first step is to feel some level of control while holding your weight steady and personally I began pretty much doing and feeling as you do now. I’m 10 years on from there now and life is no bed of roses and I have my ‘fat’ days when I feel gross and panicked but it is by no means every day. In fact it is rare now. I can concentrate now and have regained my sense of humour and interest in things other than food. I do still worry about weight and food but nothing like I used to. I didn’t believe I could recover even to this level when I was where you are now but I promise you it is possible. I know because I have done it.
    All the best and hang in there because it will be worth all the fighting one day.

  32. Thankyou csmilie123.
    I feel crazy going on a blogg but you wrote back and it helps. im glad you mentioned the word panicked, sums up a lot of how i feel. can i ask what helped you the most to move on from the self body obsession? im not sure what to do to help myself…focus on healthy eating? ignore the topic altogether? i flicker between thoughts of a psychiatrist or a nutritionist. im not sure if you have any tips? well done for getting to where you are by the way ๐Ÿ™‚

  33. hey stubborn- its great u are recovering, but yeah your still experiencing lots of ana symtpms, the half a biscuit, few bite thing is ana, its to mae u feel like u havent eaten as much as u have. ur better off eating the whole biscuit.
    you shud contact ur doctor, who can refer u to a psychologist or counceller. its good to get ur feelings out.
    its also important to remember that , recovery is about REgaining back the weight u lost, and thsat ur body is not going to change dramatically. recovery is about establishing a healthy relaitonship with food and your body now.
    good luck x

  34. well some of these things i do…i still to young to do the last one hehehehe
    …anyways im really young and in my growing age,i think i became anorexia because of my orriginal goal that was to become slim for someone,but then in the end my feelings were gone for that someone but i still kept on my diet, i lost about 40 pounds and then as i noticed i kept losing and losing more,i was even hospitalized for dehydrate and for an inflamed small intestine,after i got out (they said i was ok,i was just dehydrated) my mom brought me to a psychotherapist who told e to take this med. call remeron soltab…tsk

  35. First of all, it is REALLY nice to look at this site because it’s nice to see that other people feel the same way as me, and a lot of times I don’t have the words to describe what I am feeling, and this site provides me with those means of description.
    I am only 15 years old and therefore I’m not entirely sure about the criteria for posting on this site, but when I was 11 or 12 I began to purge any food I would put in my body because I became terrified of gaining weight due to puberty. My family is naturally underweight, and I was born into this tradition, and I usually ate as I pleased – I don’t remember much about previous eating habits. Once I started to purge my food, I didn’t really notice a significant weight loss, and after a year or so I stopped and I recovered for about two years.
    Then, about thrree months ago, I got sick with a cold and I didn’t eat much. I noticed that I was losing the weight I had gained from those previous two years of recovery, in which I had become a normal weight which in my eyes (and in my family’s eyes, may I point out) was “fat.” I discovered that I didn’t want to eat whenever food was put in front of me, although I would spend horus pining and obsessing over it. I went from 48 kg to 38 kg in two months.
    Although my mom is a part of the problem, she does care about me and can’t see that she is a part of the problem, and she took me to the doctor. I was given blood tests and set up in an eating disorder treatment program, complete with dietitian, psychologist, and doctor. I am currently in this program and have been for a month now.
    I’d like to say first off of the bat that anorexia is often portrayed as quite a positive thing. Although I would love to tell you all that I do not feel superior to other people and I hate anorexia, I don’t. I hate having the label and I absolutely hate being monitored, however I take pleasure in seeing how other people can’t resist food and I love seeing skinny girls and knowing I am as thin as they are. Anorexia is portrayed positively throughout the media, which people here tons of bullshit about constantly, however, anorexia is also portrayed very positively through “real people” on sites such as tumblr and flickr – i used to see pictures of really skinny, gorgeous vintage girls all of the time that were so beautiful in the photographs and these were half of the trigger for my anorexia for me.
    Anyway, I am currently working towards getting better. In TOTAL and complete 10000000% agreement with the comments above me, it feels to me like a lot of people are just excpecting me to get better. WIthin a week of my professional diagnosis my dietitian gave me a list of foods to eat in a day and upped my caloric intake by about 2000 calories so that I could gain back the weight I have lost. She gets angry when I do not eat what she gives me some days, and I think it is so stupid how she just assumes this is hard but i can overcome it so quickly. I have quite a large fear of becoming like the girls on here; bloated and miserable because everyone is forcing them to gain weight. I really do hope that there is a possible way for me to feel healthy and be healthy without being fat.
    I will follow up again some day, I’m sorry this was so long! It felt nice to get this off my chest. I want to get better from this eating disorder, I really do, but I wish that the people trying to fix me were not going about it in such a way. I really hope someone understands me

  36. Hey Jess,
    Totally understand how you feel.
    I too felt that people didn’t understand how hard it was to start eating normal amounts again, and i can understand how you think that it’s unfair that everyone just expects you to get better now you have help! I was in a similar situation as my parents thought that once i was seeing people the problem would go away in a few weeks.
    The best advice i can give you is to keep going with it anyway. The first time you realise you’ve gained weight will be scary, probably even the second time, however as you go on it gets better and you stress out about it less. I’ve been eating properly for about half a year now and i’m back to the weight that i was before i started. I can guarantee you that though you might feel bloated and stuff when you first start, it gets alot better over time! Stick with it and eventually (though it’ll be a hard road to tread!) you’ll learn to be comfortable with the weight you gain and you won’t feel bloated when you eat.
    Another piece of advice i would give you is to be honest with the people around you (ie, your mother). Try to have an honest discussion with her about the fact that you think that she is part of the problem. You’ll find that she probably just wants the best for you and has misunderstood how you’ve reacted to her.
    I’m glad you realise that you CAN gain weight without becoming ‘fat’. Your aim to become ‘healthy’ is great. Keep on going with trying to eat more and more every day over time you’ll become more confident with your body.
    Most importantly of all, don’t give up! Try to think of some really important reason’s that you want to start eating again (personal ones, not ones that others tell you!) and keep that in mind every time you hesitate in putting a piece of food into your mouth.
    And don’t worry about ending up “bloated and miserable”, though theres a period where you won’t be happy about gaining weight and will definately feel bloated, it gets better and soon you’ll find everything getting slightly better. For me, i found that my mood increased dramatically, my hair started shining again, i lost a whole heap of the pimples on my face, i started sleeping again (i had horrible insomnia) and people commented on how much more confident i seemed.
    I wish you all the best!

  37. hi,
    i am wondering-and severly stressing-about my metablolism after starving myself during bouts of aneorexia. now that i am eating- i dont have as much as anyone around me yet i still seem to put on weight-despite exercising a lot. will i always just haev to eat less as my body has learnt to run on little energy? im scared ill just keep putting more and more weight on and i dont understand why everyone seems to eat so much more and stay the same size. does anyone find this prob? or have any suggestions? the only thing i can think of is to see a nutritionist but i would love to avoid the expense.

    thanks for any thoughts or comments at all!

  38. I don’t know whether I count as anorexic, exactly, but I definitely have issues with food, and I don’t know how to get over it. I’ve always been a little underweight, and I always get shit about it at home. My mom always tries to push food on me. The thing is, I’m aware that I’m underweight, so I often try to push food on myself. Especially junk food. I eat way too much junk food, and tell myself it’s good for me because I need to gain weight. But then I feel really sick because I’ve eaten so much junk food. So then I can’t eat normally. Like hate when my mom pushes extra food on me at dinner because she doesn’t realize how much crap I ate earlier. It’s a really unhealthy cycle. I’m also really stressed out about my future and about some things that happened in my past. And I eat as a way of dealing with stress. It’s like my life revolves around food. How do I go back to normal?

    p.s. Yeah, it feels good just to say this. I’ve never told anyone any of this. It’s too fucked up, and everyone thinks I’m basically fine.

  39. what made yall wanna go bulmic for? is it good for overweight people bc im stressing over weight i just want to be that way to see how it is and maybe be that way

  40. I have a 14 year old daughter suffering from anorexia. It breaks my heart watching her suffer. It all started when she was 12, after bringing her to the doctor for two months because her weight was dropping and she wouldn’t eat much. The doctor sent us to the hospital for tests and they admitted her that day. I didn’t notice the three layers of clothes she had on that day. She was 12 and did all her personal care on her own. She was skipping meals and throwing away her lunches at school. I feel like I am on a wave, and I want off. My daughter started high school, I noticed her looking thin. She started throwing away her lunch at school because she was stressed out (she says). I have her on ensure again to get her weight up.(I weigh her every couple months but I can tell buy her attitude when she is down in weight) Does this ever end?

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