living authentically

an unself-conscious violinistmy friend evan has just launched a new project, living authentically. authenticity has long been an important topic for him, and i’m looking forward to seeing how he goes even deeper into it. here’s a bit about the project:

the book
the living authentically book i wrote with my partner. it is a guide to living with authenticity. it is 130 pages in hard copy pages and contains many practical exercises for each of the eight stages of authentic living. it also explains in depth each stage of the process of living authentically.

the course
the membership course is forty emails – five a week for eight weeks. each week is devoted to one stage of living authentically. after an introduction the emails are primarily devoted to guided experiences of that stage of living authentically. each stage deals with the physical, emotional, mental, spiritual and social aspects of the stage. the course is also supported by a student only forum where you can ask questions and discuss the course with me and other students.

… and there’s more, here on evan’s new site.

in announcing this site, evan asks some questions, and i’d like to pose a few of them to you.

what major benefits does living authentically offer you and others you know?

my immediate reaction to that is: freedom. freedom to live without the burden of a mask that is worn involuntarily (i see nothing wrong with temporarily putting on a mask if that’s something that you’ve consciously decided).

what do you think?


what tips would you offer to others to make it easier for them to find their core?

it’s interesting that evan links the ideas of “authenticity” and “core”. the authentic person as the one that exists underneath – what? disguise? a necessary protective layer?

here’s one tip: spend a week asking yourself: “what makes me smile?” and jot down your answers.

what are your tips?


what pitfalls would you warn them of ?

evan gives an example: don’t try to go too fast! going at a comfortable pace is likely to be more beneficial in the longterm. i would add to that what joanna mentioned a few weeks ago: as you become more yourself, it’s possible that you will lose people who feel threatened or confused by this “new you.” also, with my buddhist background, i’d like to say that we should not expect this core to be something stable and unchangeable. perhaps it’s a little like the weather: there will always be clouds in the sky but they’re never the same.

do you have any warnings?

image by carlo nicora


  1. hey this is great Evan – you are everywhere! hope you are getting plenty of takers for your course…

    major benefits – sense of joy, power, freedom, choice, where to start and finish?!

    tips? isabella’s was great. it was so good i can’t think of anything else!

    warnings – it will shake up your life. there will be people who won’t like it. there may be an upheaval period in which you will have to give up some kind of security, be it a job or relationship…when you want to find out what is real you may come across all kinds of things you hadn’t expected, which works both ways!

  2. I’m still saddened by memories of friends who suddenly changed, who were once themselves and then put on a facade to try to fit some model they thought they had to be. At first it was just what strangers and acquaintances saw, but eventually the person wears the mask for you, and you know you’ve lost them.

    I now avoid being friends with people who are obviously “faking it”: it’s too uncomfortable for me to be around them.

    gillian’s last blog post..Friday Cat Blogging: Turtle loves cat

  3. I have associated lately with some people who practice some kind of Buddhist teachings. They have one particular vow that interested me: the vow of truth. I think this is one way to live authentic lives. Try as much as possible to avoid telling a lie including white lies.

    jun bullan’s last blog post..A Movie To Watch

  4. Hi Sarah, thanks. I especially like your warning. I suspect there is much personal experience ‘behind’ it.

    Gillian, I find masks tricky. My hope is that if I can genuinely welcome someone that they may risk showing me what is behind the mask. I too tend to avoid people who are ‘faking it’ – the relationship is just not satisfying to me.

    Hi Jan, it’s an interesting vow. I think it would lead to lots of interesting discoveries. Do you think some warnings would be in order.

    Hi Isabella, the nature of the self and its changing nature is an interesting one. Is the ‘original face’ an unchanging one? It seems to me that identity persists and that this has positive aspects as well as negative ones. Maybe we could do some posts about this – I think it is a big discussion that is well worth investigating.

    Evan’s last blog post..Living Authentically Brings You Lasting Satisfaction

  5. To live authentically means to live all the prejudges you have a live free from everything. Use your imagination, create new things and know the others.
    I’d like to read that book. How can I buy it from the internet ?

    Bogdan’s last blog post..Imaginary Dialog

  6. To live authentically is not something I’d imagine most folks strive after. I’d love to live in that freedom, though I acknowledge that mask wearing has its place.

    I struggle constantly with moderating and censoring who I am for those around me. It’s both for my own sake and for theirs. Most folks are not capable of dealing with the truth of who they are, let alone someone else.

    Todd Jordan’s last blog post..St. Louis February Tweetup – Schafley

  7. Hi Todd, I think masks (and other ways of looking after ourselves and others) are entirely appropriate.

    I think gradually we can be deeply in touch with ourselves and others. I do think it takes consistent work, but each step can be a pleasure.

    It’s my experience that with slow and gentle work we can have greater freedom.

    Evan’s last blog post..Living Authentically Brings You Lasting Satisfaction

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